He Used To Be Infatuated With Me: What Happened?

"I remember a few months back when this guy was so into me and kept chasing after me. He was literally begging for my attention. I made it obvious to him that I just wasn't interested, but he was as stubborn as a goat. After a long time of chasing, I decided to give him a chance. Things went well; he was romantic and would chat me up regularly, and we'd make time where we'd meet up, and sometimes we had sex. But a few months down the line, everything changed. He's no longer drawn to me like before, and he seems to be busy an awful lot these days and barely has time for me. I like to think he no longer fancies me; perhaps he's found another 'little birdie' he's chasing now. I just want to know what happened. Did I do something wrong? Were there signs I ignored? Where did it all go wrong?"
Is this you? Does this scenario seem to resonate with you? I bet every woman, at some point, can relate...

Let's get to the bottom of this.

So basically it's not uncommon for women to have men who like them and chase after them, and it's totally normal. Men are naturally attracted by what they see, and if they think it's worth going after, the chase will begin. You must note that, however, guys will not chase things that they don’t think they have to chase. Meaning if they know that they have you, there’s no need for them to chase.

Also, if they feel that you're acting in a way that is intended to make them chase, they’ll remember it. But don't forget that nobody likes being deliberately manipulated.

Where the guy finally has your attention and you give in and you both start up something romantic and life seems perfect, but a few weeks down the line, you notice some changes and you think... "He's not just that into me anymore." You see, things like this aren't uncommon either.
Take for instance, you see a nice pair of shoes online, you immediately fall in love with them, and you become suddenly determined to save up some money and purchase them before anyone else does. When you like something so bad, you struggle so hard to get it. When you eventually get to buy the shoes, you cherish them for as long as possible, but as time goes on, you start losing the initial interest you once had for the shoes. Reasons could be that you had your eyes on something else, or the shoes simply lost value, or you've just been too busy with life to give a damn about those damn shoes anyway. Now try applying this fair example to the present situation being discussed.

As "so-not-appropriate" as it may seem for me to not make such comparisons between shoes and human beings, I just want you to understand that these two are undeniably real-life events even though they may have their differences. The picture I want to paint is how they seem to relate to each other so that way you can grasp the imagery of the entire story. Sometimes when a guy who seems to show interest in you starts chasing you, you should try as much as you can to truly understand his intentions towards you—if they're genuine, long-term, and beyond physical.

Nowadays, scumbags prowl the world of girls, mostly the vulnerable ones at heart, seeking their emotional ruins. When this mission is accomplished, they embark on another trail, leaving their victims to their fate. Once you're able to analyze a guy's intentions, you can then work your way through them to see if you can cope with them, manage, or discard them without giving him a chance with you.

If you give in to a guy that's been chasing you and somehow you both end up in a relationship, I'd advise you not to lose focus of who you were before he became a part of your life. Don't get too attached and neglect the life you once had before anything else. Stay relentlessly appealing, confident, and occupied with other things besides the things of relationships. Don't get too carried away and make the guy the center of your existence. Most times, women get too deep into the idea of a relationship; they become so overwhelmed by everything happening around them and act like they've hit a jackpot.

Sometimes when a guy that used to be infatuated with you loses interest, the commonest reason known to man is that he has found someone else he's interested in. Meaning, there's a girl around the corner who has caught his eye, and he feels this excitement he once felt towards you for her, and usually, the excitement turns into a determination to go after her.

Another reason could be that he actually got busy with other things, and he's got a lot on his plate, which could mean that he's still infatuated with you but can't seem to be all over you like he used to because his focus has been diverted to more demanding things of life. But it's normal for women to feel this way (neglected) and assume love is lost on them, when in reality, that may not be the case.

Another reason why he may truly not be infatuated with you could be that you've lost that sense of appeal he once liked about you that made him chase after you. Your charisma and every other attractive and charming quality you possess could've been the things that attracted him to you, and after he was drawn to you, he may, after some time, have observed those features fading off of you, or perhaps you let go of them unconsciously because you became distracted by the littlest things that don't matter much. When he senses you no longer possess them, he becomes unattracted to you. It's even worse when you suddenly turn into the notoriously needy, desperate, and shirt-tugging "don't-leave-me" girlfriend.

Now that's a serious problem, and it's no surprise when guys leave girls who turn out this way.

Another reason could be that you lack the ability to be expressive about your feelings about him. Reciprocity of feelings or emotions could be a drive for him because it gives him a sense of hope that he's not fighting a losing game. That is, he's not chasing after something that's going to be impossible to have in the end. So lack of response to one's feelings towards you could make them give up on the chase because it makes no sense going after something you're fully and consciously aware you'll never have.

Another reason, among many others, could be that he may have had or been given the impression that you want more of him, a commitment—that you want a future with him. Some guys are scared of commitment while some just don't like the pressure that comes from relationships. Not every relationship ends in marriage!

A guy may want to be in a committed relationship with a girl he adores, loves or cherishes because of companionship, shared interests and aspirations, etc. Anything but marriage could be something he never envisioned or thought about. So when you throw signals about getting married someday or having kids for him or just being his forever bride, you'll only scare him off. At that point, the realization of both of you presently not being on the same page will dawn on him, and he'll find himself slowly breaking out of the relationship. It may not be what he wants, but his subconscious already understands that you both want different things in life, and before you know it, he'll not be "that into you anymore"...

I hope this helps. 😊🌹